takorean bowl


It’s basically 75 degrees outside so I’m in denial.

I was grateful for the warm weather this past weekend, though, because we did our first annual Hallowine/Boowery Tour with some friends out at the lake! We hit 5 different wineries/breweries in costume and it was so much fun.

This year I went with a pretty obscure 90s TV reference. If you don’t remember it, just watch the commercial here. It was one of those costumes where 80% of people didn’t know what we were, but it was completely worth it for the couple of people who freaked out over it and asked to take our picture.


Most people thought I was Barbara Bush, but whatever. We also had a shockingly accurate Ken Bone, and Gaston from Beauty & The Beast. It was a lively bunch.

To my knowledge, Muzzy only speaks English, French, Spanish, Italian, and German. But if you’re looking for some Asian flavor, I’ve got you covered with this recipe.

There’s a place in DC called Union Market that has a bunch of different food vendors, and our favorite is Takorean. I set out to mimic their incredible rice/kale/meat bowl here.


I did a big boneless pork loin in the slow cooker, with a marinade relatively similar to this one. I didn’t have any chili garlic paste, so I threw in some hot red jalapenos and minced garlic. Seemed to do the trick.

For the kale slaw, I took probably 6 cups of kale and chopped up some of it and put some of it in my new food processor. The food processor was SUPER aggressive and gave me kale powder after about 2 pulses, which is why I chopped the rest. I also used the food processor to pulverize 4 small radishes, 1 shallot, and about a cup of carrots. For some added color and flavor.


For the dressing, I whisked together 2 tablespoons of gochujang (you can find this in the international foods section), about 1 1/2 tablespoons of soy sauce, 1 tablespoon of rice vinegar, and 1 teaspoon of hoisin. If you don’t have hoisin you can sub brown sugar- it’s just to cut the spiciness of the gochujang with a little sweetness.

Toss the kale in the dressing and let it sit. Cook some rice (I just used regular brown rice), and assemble your bowl!


Okay, I actually used plates because I didn’t have a bowl that was big enough to accommodate the serving size I needed after teaching back-to-back classes at the gym. But it’s better to use a bowl so you can stir it all together.

Top with a little sour cream, sriracha, and cilantro. Maybe a squeeze of lime juice.


Between the tiny kale pieces and the Muzzy fur (yes, I made that costume out of a blanket purchased on Amazon), my entire apartment was covered in green. It took several rounds of swiffering and sweeping to get it all out of there.

I recommend just doing the kale slaw for now.

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