I love Baltimore. I especially love my neighborhood, Federal Hill. It’s so quaint with all the rowhouses and young people out jogging and walking their dogs. There are dozens of great restaurants and good happy hour specials. The view from the top of Federal Hill park is probably one of the best in the city. I can run around M&T Bank Stadium and Camden Yards, or walk to the gym in 7 minutes. Cross Street on a Saturday morning smells like stale beer and bad decisions. Reminds me of college.  My love list is endless.

You know what I don’t love about my home sweet home? Parking.

The person who administered my road test when I was 16 forgot to have me parallel park. At the time I thought I hit the lottery because I most certainly would have failed, especially since I backed my mom’s van into our mailbox practicing the night before which slightly killed my self esteem. Now I wish I had had a little more practice. I’m definitely getting better, but even William the Civic can be hard to wedge into some spots.

What drives me crazy is when people park in the center of a gigantic space that could fit two cars, but instead leave what I refer to as “asshole spots” in front and behind them that could realistically only fit a bicyle. Then I have a temper tantrum behind the wheel.

I have no solution to resolve this problem, but it’s been what is irking me as of late.

Now stay with me for this rhyme and this metaphor- what is WORKING for me as of late is wedging layers of custard chocolate and graham cracker together. No gaps, no asshole spots. No problems whatsoever.  Deliciousness for all.

Was that a stretch?

Eat some cake, you’ll forgive me.

Boston Creme Icebox Cake

10-12 graham crackers

for custard: (from allrecipes)

2 cups skim milk

2 eggs

2 tbs cornstarch

1/3 cup white sugar

1 tsp vanilla extract

for the chocolate layer

1 cup heavy cream

1 1/2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

1 tbs butter or margarine

1 tsp vanilla

For the custard: crack and whisk the eggs in a small bowl, set aside.

Combine milk, sugar, and cornstarch over medium heat. Stir occasionally, until the milk starts to bubble around the edges. Pour about 2 tablespoons of the milk into the eggs, whisking constantly. This is to temper the eggs- if you pour them directly into the hot milk they’ll scramble. Once they are tempered, add to the milk and put over heat again.

Stir for 3-4 minutes until it thickens. Stir in the vanilla. Remove from heat and set aside.

Set up your double boiler (or a bowl over a pot of boiling water) for the ganache. Make sure the bottom of the bowl isn’t touching the water. Combine the chocolate, heavy cream, butter, and vanilla. Stir constantly until shiny and smooth.

Let it cool a bit before you lick the side of the bowl. Grease a 9×9 baking dish (or whatever size you have). Arrange graham crackers in a single layer with minimum cracks in between.

Pour about 1/3 of the custard over the graham crackers, then drizzle a little ganache over that. Do another layer of graham crackers, custard, and ganache. I did three layers, with the final top layer of ganache a little thicker/completely covering the top.

Place in the freezer for at least 4 hours to set up and harden. Move to the fridge before serving- if it’s completely frozen it’s really hard to cut.

I actually think this might be better the next day. The graham cracker softens a bit and all the layers come together and it’s SO good. So try to think ahead for this one.

And try not to park like a fool. Ya hear?